We ended up playing a few rounds of chess, which I totally appreciated. Stimulating my brain is always welcome. I enjoyed the distraction—and eye candy—but when he left, I was alone again with my problems. I can put on as many brave faces as I want. I can meditate and make myself believe I am ok and everything will be fine. But I’m really scared. What if Winston doesn’t want this? I might need to wrap my head around doing it alone.