As excited as I was for the conversation with Devonte,
I wanted to go home, put on my PJs, eat ice cream, watch movies, and mope, though I didn’t understand why. It’s not like I had a chance with Laurant with Diamond always in his face. But if such a chance existed, it’ll be forever lost. He’s such a good guy and will probably want to do the right thing and stay with her. Poor guy. But I’m sure I’ll be able to get over after Devonte says he wants to be with me. Besides, I didn’t want to be rude and ditch him, so I followed Diamond back to the house and found Devonte in his room waiting for me. He smiled really big when I walked through the door; I felt special. I sat next to him on the bed, preparing to hear all kinds of yummy goodness. Instead, he kissed me. I’ll never complain about his lips touching mine, but I didn’t like where this was going. His hands drifted down to my thighs, and I gently pushed him away. Was he for real? He wanted to woohoo with his entire family in the house on a twin bed in a room he shared with his older brother? To this, he said, “So? You wanna do it or not?” I’ll take not for 200, Alex.
He let out the biggest, longest sigh as he put some distance between us. I was sorry to disappoint him, and even sorrier he didn’t want to get serious with me. But maybe there was still hope. Maybe he wanted to play first and talk later. Yeah! That’s probably it. Just like me with the movie. He was probably nervous and figured woohoo first would make it easier. I helped him out by bringing it up and asking where he saw us going.
“Why do we need to go anywhere?” he asked.
Wow.
I felt pressure behind my eyes, but I commanded the tears not to fall. My stomach rolled, and there was a tightness in my chest I never felt before. I wanted to run home and collapse in Mommy’s arms. She warned against this, but I got excited about this fantasy I created anyway. He wasn’t interested in me at all. Was this what everyone’s been trying to tell me?
Even though I wanted more from him, and his words cut through me like shards of glass, he’s right. We don’t have to go anywhere. Sims my age aren’t thinking about relationships and settling down. They’re just having fun. Maybe I could just have fun too. And maybe during our fun he’ll find he wants more and we’ll finally have that conversation. Maybe I could have it both ways.
