Once he assessed I was physically fine, he let me have it. Naturally, he wanted to know where I’d been and why I didn’t answer him. Although he told me to take all the time I needed, he thought I’d at least check in and let him know I was ok so he wouldn’t have to wait for me all night. He was worried something happened to me. Something happened to me alright, but it’s nothing like he’s thinking. All night, he’s been sick with concern about me. I wish I could say I was concerned about him too. I mean, I was. I am! I really, really am. I just chose poorly.
When he asked where I’d been, I took a deep breath to still myself and prepare for the worse part of this dumpster fire of a night: tell half truths to the sweetest sim on earth who did nothing to deserve this. I said I was out and about.
“It’s been four hours, Em. And I looked for you a few times. Where did you go?”
I told him I went to Dwayne’s in a very casual, dismissive manner, hoping to disarm him. It’s not unusual for me to go over there.
“Dwayne…”
The way his name lingered in the air… It felt like being in dense fog, unable to sense which direction the danger is coming. I panicked and kept talking.
“I was on my way back and saw his light on, so I went over there to tell him about Mommy.”
So far, so good. No lies detected. My palms are a little sweaty, but it’s all good.
“Ok, that’s fine. But why didn’t you answer me?”
“Sorry about that. I fell asleep.”
His narrowing baby blues almost froze me solid. I was so nervous and stiff. I could barely blink.
“If you were so tired, why didn’t you just come home?”
That is an excellent question. If I could answer it, maybe I wouldn’t need to put on this charade.
“Look, Ali, I’m sorry I didn’t answer you. And I’m sorry I didn’t check in. I’m-I’m really messed up right now, ok? I didn’t plan for anything to happen tonight.”
That one eyebrow shot up. “Did something happen?”
“N-no. Why?”
“I don’t know. You said it, not me. What were you guys doing?”
Throughout our entire relationship, I told myself I would be honest about what happened between me and Dwayne if Ali ever asked. I had nothing to hide. We were both single. It was a perfectly acceptable fling. But this is not that, and I can no longer honor that promise. I can’t tell him the truth now!
“We were just talking! You know how we are,” I said, waving my hand dismissively, again.
He stared blankly at me for what felt like forever. “No. Actually, I don’t.”
