Mama called and invited us over for dinner that night, so Sophia and I discussed whether we would share our news when she inevitably asked us about her grandchildren. We knew she could handle it, and would offer to help any way she could, but we decided to keep it to ourselves for the moment. I didn’t enjoy keeping secrets from my mother, but letting the world in felt like defeat at this stage. Sophia had only just begun the treatments. She could be pregnant by tomorrow. It wasn’t time to worry everyone, especially when they weren’t suspicious yet.
But to both of our surprise, we got through the entire evening without one question or comment about babies. Not even Alessia, who was even nosier, said anything. Without a story to fabricate, we ate in a semblance of peace with our secret between us, hoping one day this would be a distant memory added as a footnote in our story.
Back at home, I caught Sophia sneaking out of the bathroom as I headed for bed. She froze like she got caught stealing when she spotted me, but then the disappointed took over. I sighed, not because I knew what she did in there, but because of her tenacity. I loved how she wouldn’t give up despite how much it hurt. But I didn’t want her to end every day disappointed if these treatments didn’t work, so I grabbed her by the hand and led her into our room.
“It’s okay, you know. Maybe it takes a while for it to take effect.”
“Or maybe it won’t work for me.”
“Don’t say that. It’ll work. And even if it doesn’t, it’s not the end. We’ll just move on to the next thing. Regardless of how it happens, very soon, we’ll have our baby, and we’ll be in our new house, and everything will be great.”
She sighed, nodding in agreement, but I could tell she struggled to believe.
“Is it bad that I hope we don’t have to adopt? Does that make me like my parents?”
“Not at all. I think everyone prefers their own blood. It’s natural.”
“It’s just that… You have all these beautiful family ties. There’s only me. I don’t want my existence to be just a blip on radar, here one day and gone the next, forgotten and unimportant. I want to leave a piece of me behind so my life matters!”
I couldn’t hold it together anymore. The dam broke, and tears flooded my face. I hated how much those idiots who birthed and raised her affected her life. She arguably was the best sim to ever walk the earth; The star in my sky; The light in my darkness; The gummy bear in my pancakes! No one else mattered to me quite like she did.
“Sophia, you do matter! You matter to me! You matter to this family! My life has been a thousand times better because you’re in it! And when we’re finally able to hold our child, whether it’s ours or not, you’ll matter to him too! Her. Whoever! You’re gonna love the hell out of them, and they’ll think you’re the best sim on earth. Right?”
She nodded through her tears.
“Yes. I love it so much already! I haven’t even met it yet.”
“Exactly. Don’t worry. It’ll happen.”