Once Desiree was satisfied, I placed her in the bassinet, snapped a picture to send to everyone, and called Mama. Naturally, she thought I was still at the hospital, so I told her our heroic tale of home birth. It upset her at first because anyone in their right mind would have been concerned about giving birth unassisted. But in the end, she said she was proud of me. Dad was still over there, so she told him of his new granddaughter, and he came over immediately. Sophia was supposed to be resting, but was much too excited to sleep and eager to spend time with Desi. I mean, she was probably the best baby ever born, so I didn’t kick back too much when she appeared at the door when Dad arrived. She promised to go to bed as soon as he left.
“She’s beautiful, son. I’m really happy for you both.”
“Thanks, Dad.”
Knowing Sophia couldn’t sleep because she wanted to hold our daughter, I probably should have given Desi up, but I couldn’t part with her. At least not yet. I asked if Dad wanted to hold her because it was the right thing to do, but I was glad he declined. He, like me, was skittish about holding her, even after having two children of his own. The more I held her, the more comfortable I became. At that rate, I’d be a professional newborn handler in no time.
“When you were a toddler,” he began, “I was still afraid of you. Of course, you were bigger and less fragile then, but I had never really been around children before and didn’t know what to do with you.”
Looking back, I saw evidence of that all the way through our childhood. He was naturally a laid-back guy, but his parenting style was also very hands off. He basically let us do whatever we wanted, only stepping in when it was critical or we came to him. Mama was kind of passive too, but she checked in with us from time to time to see how things were going and how she could help. What kind of parent did I aspire to be? I certainly couldn’t see myself as a helicopter, but I think I’d like to be less be passive. Only time would tell what I’d become.
“I learned quickly how fickle children are at that age and was deathly afraid of you having a tantrum, so I tried to talk to you nicely when it was time for a bath or whatever I needed you to do. You thought it was funny and would mock me.”
“Really?? I did that?”
“Sure did.”
“I bet you were so adorable,” Sophia said.
“He was. They both were. And now you both have your own. I wish I had more time to see them grow up, but I’m happy just knowing they exist.”
“Don’t talk like that, Dad.”
“I’m old, Luca. I won’t be around forever.”
Sad doggie whimpers saved me from that conversation. It’s not that I didn’t realize my parents had gotten on in age, but I didn’t want to discuss it yet. I was still high from becoming a parent for the first time. He could burst my bubble after my birthday, and he better not die before then.
“What’s the matter, Rosie? Did you hear the baby? You have a little sister now. Come here. Let’s get you introduced.”
I put down Des, picked up Rosie, and brought her to the bassinet.
“This is Desiree. She’s gonna be your new playmate soon, and I’m gonna get you and Kooper some treats so you can play with her for a really long time.”
She licked my face, so I guess she forgave me. I hadn’t completely neglected them, but she and Kooper definitely got lost in the shuffle.
“We still love you and Koop. You were our first babies! But this baby is gonna need a lot of help, so don’t think I don’t love you if we don’t go jogging every day, okay?”
“You’re such a good daddy,” Sophia said.
I think I detected a hint of flirt in there, but I kept that thought to myself. Maybe when she wasn’t struggling to keep her eyes opened I’d revisit, heh. She excused herself to go to bed a few minutes later. Desiree began fussing again, but I didn’t have to guess what she needed that time; I could smell it. Dad had gone downstairs, probably to see what he could do around the house to help, so it was on me to get Little Miss Lady cleaned up. It was surprisingly not that hard. At least I hope I did it right.
