When Sophia had her fill of making fun of my misfortune, she shifted gears, expressing her excitement about having the Banks family over tomorrow. I shared that sentiment and hoped it didn’t rain so I could throw some ribs on the grill and enjoy the sunshine for once. So far, this spring has been very stormy, and our family is not built to be cooped up inside for days on end.
“And after that,” she said after a lull, “it will be Desi’s birthday! Can you believe it??”
“I cannot. I truly cannot.”
It felt like just yesterday we were loving on her in the nursery, celebrating a big milestone. Just last week, Sophia delivered her unassisted right in our bed! But in two days, she’ll be a teenager? Where has all this time gone? It excited me, frightened me, and angered me, too. I’d been thinking about it a lot. Even more so after visiting my parents and talking to the lawyer about the future. I am far from death, but I am painfully aware there is more life behind me than ahead, and it upsets me. Not because I want to live forever or anything like that, but because life has not been fair to us. I did everything right. I honored my parents. I looked after my sister. I didn’t drink too much. I helped sims lead better lives. I didn’t objectify women. I took my time and found the one for me. We got married and tried to start a family, but it just wouldn’t happen. We spent so much time on those stupid treatments that never worked. By the time Desi was born, we probably could have had two children by then. I know it’s morbid, but I can’t help but think about how old she’s gonna be when we die, and that’s what really angers me. She’s gonna be so young, barely scratching the surface of her life. It’s not fair. She shouldn’t have to live out her adult days without parents like me and Less. We should be around to give her advice and kidnap her babies when she needs a break. Why should all the children in this family have such faint memories of their elders? I want to be more than just a face in a portrait! When my grandkids look at my picture, I want them to say, “Grandpa Luca was so… I remember when we….” A solution existed, but I hadn’t been brave enough to voice it because it honestly sounded kinda sketchy. But I can’t let this anger keep eating at me like this. It’s time to suck it up and discuss it with the missus.
“So, uhhh…I have a crazy proposal. Well, in light of everything that has happened this week, maybe it won’t be so crazy.”
“You’re probably right,” she said. “What are you thinking about?”
Oh no. I had intended to keep all those thoughts to myself, but that question unlocked the floodgate, and I felt the emotions rushing through. She doesn’t need this energy. I’ve gotta control it.
“I’m thinking we both deserve more time with our family.”
Her head cocked to the side as she tried to anticipate where this would go, which did not help my situation.
“I’m thinking we deserve to have relationships with our grandchildren. I’m thinking Desi shouldn’t be an orphan so young. We all deserve a full life!”
“Luca, I… What… I mean, I don’t disagree, but what are you going on about?”
“Have you seriously never thought about it?”
“Thought about what?”
“Drinking the Potion of Youth!”
Her jaw dropped and eyes shot open like she gasped, but no sound came out.
“I’ve been thinking about it ever since Mama died,” I continued. “I remember sitting there, looking at Desiree in the crib, thinking she’s gonna be nowhere near close to her adult days when she has to bury her mother, and it isn’t fair. She doesn’t deserve to face that kind of agony so early in life.”
Sophia sat there for a moment, searching for words.
“I mean, of course, I’ve always been aware of my age, but… Honestly, it was such a privilege to even get pregnant. She’s here, and I’m just so grateful for that. If I let myself get carried away with the future, I’ll miss what’s happening right under my nose.”
“It burns me up. We’re good sims, Sophia. We deserve to enjoy the family we fought so hard to create! If we do this, we could add, like, 40-odd days to our life! Sure, that’s not a lot of time in the grand scheme of things, but it’s definitely enough to make sure Desi is okay and leave a mark on our grandchildren’s lives. What do you think?”
“I think … It’s not a bad idea, but…”
She shifted in her seat for a while, mulling this over, weighing her options.
“What about everyone else?” she asked.
“Who?”
“Alessia! Your friends! I love that you’re thinking about our family, but we don’t live on an island by ourselves, Luca! If we reset, you’re going to watch your sister and Maira and everyone get old and die. How long will you have to live without them? Can you handle that?”
I always said she was smarter than me. She always looks at the bigger picture when I have tunnel vision. I love that about her, but she popped my balloon.
“So, you don’t think we should do it, then?”
“I didn’t say that. I just think there’s an opportunity here. Personally, I don’t want all our friends to die and have to make new ones. And I think if you talked to them, they’d probably want to do it too. Alessia is in our same boat, and Maira just found love with a man much younger than her. I don’t know what Chi Chi will do, but I can’t see the others not wanting in. Just talk to them. If they say no, fine. We’ll deal with it. But if they say yes, we can all live a fuller life together.”
Again, she saw something I could not. Her words were like music to my ears. Finally, I could chuck this weight I carried and rest easy.
“I love you so much. You always cover all the angles! Let’s talk to Less about it at the kids’ birthday party. We can get to everyone else throughout the week.”
