Desi inched toward the sofa and sat down carefully, nervous and completely clueless as to what we had to discuss this time. She probably thought she was in trouble for calling me fat, heh. Instead of allaying her anxiety, I used those few seconds to figure out how to break the news. But she’s much older than she was before. Even though I’ll always try to shield her from painful details, I didn’t need to sugarcoat the truth anymore. She showed me how tough she was during the robbery. I think she might do okay with the unfiltered truth.
She eyed me curiously while I sat trapped in my thoughts.
“What’s wrong, Daddy?”
I felt like crying again, but I had to be strong. If I fell apart, that would make things awkward and put my child in a position she didn’t need to be in. So, I cleared my throat, shook away the fear, and took a deeeeeep cleansing breath.
“I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but I haven’t been feeling well lately.”
She snorted.
“Yeah, you’ve been sooo dramatic.”
I chuckled nervously.
“Yeah, I guess I have, heh. Well, there’s a reason for that.”
Here we go, Luc. No turning back. I took another breath.
“Our first night here, I was abducted by aliens.”
She blinked, waiting for me to recant that sentence the same way I waited for the doctor to tell me he was pranking me.
“Wait, you’re serious?” she asked.
“Unfortunately.”
“Aliens are real??”
“They are, and they took me and…” The pressure of tears tried to arrest me again, but I swallowed it. “They—they did things to me… I’m fat because I’m pregnant.”
She had that deer in headlights look, just as I expected.
“You’re gonna be a big sister,” I added, hoping to jog her out of shock, but I failed, so I tried again. “It’s a boy.”
“W-wait—But, how?”
I shrugged.
“I’ve been asking that question for two days. I wish I could explain it to you, but I have no clue.”
I shook my head at the doctor’s advanced alien nanotechnology hypothesis. With all the pain I’d been in, I’m pretty sure my pores were not the hole they used to implant their spawn, and the instrument was definitely not microscopic!
“So like…you’re really having a baby?”
I saw a tiny flash of betrayal in her eyes. A tremble of fear in her voice made me take a more proactive approach before things escalated.
“You’re safe, okay? Remember what I told you? You’re always safe with me.”
She nodded.
“I realize how much you enjoy hanging out with us—with me—and I know you thought it would always be like this. I did too. But you’re my firstborn. No one can ever take that special bond away from us. But the baby is going to need a lot of attention for a while, and that means we might not get to hang out as much. I need you to understand that my absence doesn’t mean I love the baby more than you. Babies are just a lot of work, so me and Mommy will be busy for a while. But if you help us, I know he would love it.”
“Me?”
“Oh yes. Big sisters are very important. I’m a big brother, so I know these things.”
“What do I have to do?” she asked.
“Well, you don’t have to do anything, but it would be great if you did. You’re going to be his first friend. That alone will give you a special bond that not even he and I will have. He’s going to look up to you and admire you.”
“He will?”
“For sure. And if you protect him and make him feel safe, he will grow up to be your biggest fan.”
“That’s cool…I guess.”
“Yeah, it is. But, listen. I know I’m asking a lot of you, and this has all been very sudden, so I’m not expecting you to be okay with it right now. Between you and me, I’m still not okay with it. But whenever you get there, I would love it if you hung out with us.”
“Okay.”
“I love you more than anything. That will never change, no matter how crazy life gets, okay?”
Finally, a tiny smile.
“Okay.”
Kooper ran in and hopped on the couch, looking and smelling like he’d been partying all night, heh.
“Hey,” I shouted. “Where have you been, mister? We looked all over for you! Boy, do you stink! Let’s get you cleaned up.”
In the middle of me giving him a good scrub, Desi knocked on the bathroom door and announced Dub was at the door, and I froze. Panic washed over me, and I looked around to find a place to hide, but there was none. I worried about what he would think of my story, but if I couldn’t trust my best friend with one of my worst moments, I’m in bad shape. He and everyone else needed to be informed anyway, so I may as well get it over with. I told her to tell Dub I’d be out in a few and to make himself at home. I finished bathing Kooper and gave myself another pep talk.
